so there's this guy, paul janka, who i have decided is the new worst person on the planet in late 2007 (the title formerly being held by lori drew, the mom-turned-myspace cyberbully). ANYWAY, janka goes beyond the terms 'douchebag' or 'sleazeball' or 'scumbag' or even 'date rapist' in my opinion... i think he's the antichrist. or, at least the antichrist of relationships.
he espouses the following advice to men in NY who wish to get laid:
• "One good exercise is to pass patio restaurants on a summer night, and notice how many women are eating with other women (especially in NYC). You think they want to be eating with their complaining, whining friend, who is depressed and with whom they have to split the bill? Of course not! They'd jump at the opportunity to be with a guy, so ask them out and then bang the shit out of them!"
• "Pick-up girls midweek in the middle of the day while they are walking around. Do not attempt to hustle girls on a weekend night when you are competing with every other Dick. Little secret: the hottest ones are the easiest to fuck. Why? Because they are most confident, and don't guard their pussy like it's their only asset. That's my true experience."
• "Conversation—What the Hell do I talk about as this Girl gets Liquored-Up? As little as possible, is the answer. At least about yourself. Guys are notorious for blabbing on and on about themselves when out for the first time with a girl. Girls have different brains than we do and follow different cues; talking about your job may seem interesting, and the part about you being "employed" is, but frankly, women don't give a shit about that."
• "A standard timeline would be meeting, call or text the next day saying hi and setting the drink date for two days hence. Time between initial meeting and drink should never be more than 5 days; you should always try your best to fuck her after that first night, as well."
soooooo... where do i begin. well, for starters, nothing he says seems that shocking to me, since i feel like i went to law school with roughly 35 guys like this, and no one is hunting them down or writing blog articles about them (though perhaps they should be). i guess the thing about this guy that is so disgustingly disgusting to me is that a) this ideology (if you can call it that) is his claim to fame; b) he's able to parlay his 'experience' into 'today show' appearances and a book option (mofo can't even write!!!); and c) he's not even original - there's shit out there already like the book 'the game' which sells the same misogynistic crap.
his whole popular existence raises other questions and concerns as well. after sharing the above-linked story with some male friends, a couple of them - who are not generally misogynistic, macho, or anything remotely frat-boy-ish - were kind of like "what's the big deal" about the whole thing. one commented that it's really the girls who fall for wankers like janka who are to blame, and not the jankas themselves. (i think i'm just going to refer to this whole classification of guys as 'jankas').
now, my friends raise an interesting point, which made me think about what/whom i am truly frustrated with. am i more upset with the jankas, or that my female comrades can't see past his brand of trickery and arrogant self-serving ways?
hmmmmm... it might be a little of both.
generally, i would pride myself for not being the type of girl who is even remotely attracted to a janka. i am not really attracted to harvard-types; rich boys; preppies; the generically good-looking; the type of smooth operator who approaches girls in daylight in a sober, non-bar setting; or slick professionals.
i have, however, fallen victim to two of the above - the rich boy (a wannabe janka) and the smooth daytime operator (who turned out to have been on a four-day bender and was unabashedly drunk when he approached me; since he was a stranger i did not know). so. i am not wholly innocent, and can relate somewhat to girls who go out with jankas.
plus, i mean, i have lots of female friends. and, unlike me, a lot of them have very specific ideas about who they want to date, and, sadly, a lot of those qualities happen to be possessed by jankas - professional/successful, good-looking, well-dressed, confident. so are the girls really to blame for being attracted to some friendly, handsome devil who approaches them and proceeds to lay on some charm? are they to blame for having... well, some would call it standards, some would call it high expectations, but i refer to it as a mental checklist. can they help it if they are looking for a particular type of guy, but it just so happens that a disproportionate number of that type of guy are jankas?
i don't really know the answer. i do know that i've never really had a mental checklist - i mean, not much more than "treats me well", "makes me laugh", and "won't cheat on me". i don't think that means i have LOW expectations or NO standards... i just don't want some janka with a sense of entitlement and a desire to sexually conquer every woman in LA and orange counties.
at the same time, i understand where the mental checklist-girls are coming from. they, too, feel like they are entitled to something, but not some hornball who is going to fake getting drunk in order to get into her pants.
in the end, i think it comes back to this mantra i came up with several years ago - nice guys may finish last, but nice girls finish worst. nice girls have to put up with a LOT of bullshit and smutty janka guys before they find the nice guys. meanwhile, the nice guys have been kicking it in the corners while their buddies, the jankas, have been drinking their seltzer waters and calculating how long it will take for the young lady next to them to blow them. if the nice guys stopped being unconsciously jealous of their janka friends, or realized their niceness is EXACTLY what girls really do need, then maybe we wouldn't be in this mess and the jankas would cease to exist everywhere.
here's hoping.
18 December 2007
30 November 2007
when good food = bad breath
weird how some of the tastiest meals can leave you with pretty rank breath for the rest of the day, the kind that can't be sated by candy, subsequent meals, or gum. yesterday, the culprit was indian food - went to a lunch bufft w/coworkers, and while it was quite scrummy (scrumptious + yummy), the tastes/flavors remained in my mouth for about 8 or so hours. i even gargeled w/listerine and later burped the essence of tikka masala.
today the culprit was/is something called "chicken noodle soup" from a thai restaurant across the street from where i work. i put quotes on that b/c i don't believe something so tasty should have such a bland americanized name. it's a really strong-flavored broth to which you add sprouts, green onion, white chicken meat, some shrimp, cilantro, and thai noodles. it's kind of like pho, in a way, in both its simplicity and the ability to customize your soup. but i dunno what it is - the broth or green onion or what - but that taste is not going away.
i spit hot fire!!
today the culprit was/is something called "chicken noodle soup" from a thai restaurant across the street from where i work. i put quotes on that b/c i don't believe something so tasty should have such a bland americanized name. it's a really strong-flavored broth to which you add sprouts, green onion, white chicken meat, some shrimp, cilantro, and thai noodles. it's kind of like pho, in a way, in both its simplicity and the ability to customize your soup. but i dunno what it is - the broth or green onion or what - but that taste is not going away.
i spit hot fire!!
12 November 2007
the mos def effect.
[disclaimer: i've been meaning to write this post for a while. what better time then when i am bored at work? anyway, this post has been like a lover i like to emotionally abuse - i pay lots of attention to it for a while, then take off without explanation for a couple of weeks, without returning texts or voicemail. hence - my thoughts might come across as kind of scattered, as this topic is something i grappled with for a while, and i tend to come up with new ideas/theories at inopportune times - in the shower; while driving; during conference calls at work.]
i have seen atmosphere, a minnesotan hip hop collective consisting of a rapper called slug and a producer called ant, a total of six times in various concert venues. i've seen the multi-talented mos def perform four times. i've seen mos' sometime-collaborator, talib kweli, a total of three times. the roots - the best hip hop band ever - i believe i've seen them two or three times. with the exception of talib, the aforementioned hip hop acts are among my all-time favorites, and i have listened to each artist/group obsessively at some point in my life.... however, all have succumbed to a plight i have tentatively named the mos def effect.
let me first briefly define the mos def effect, and then i'll elaborate on its background (according to me), its warning signs, and its proliferation.
the mos def effect occurs when an artist - presumably one of your favorites - begins to have less-than-stellar live performances. the live set is not lacking in energy or any technical/sound quality; rather, the substance of the set is borderline unbearable. put simply, the mos def effect occurs when a once-brilliant artist begins to have increasingly lazy, confusing, obnoxious, and/or annoying live performances, and one begins to question why they ever liked the artist in the first place.
- background and offenders -
ATMOSPHERE:
i began to detect the first traces of the mos def effect fairly recently, when i saw atmosphere perform at the wiltern in 2005. it was my fifth atmosphere show, and i was quite excited for it. atmosphere had become my favorite music group based largely on the fact their live shows were so incredible; slug is an engaging, dynamnic, and passionate rapper who really connects to the audience, and he generally enlisted some very skilled DJs to back up his vocals. however. for this particular performance, the DJ was resigned to being part of a larger backing band. whereas, in past shows, a heavy metal song snippet would be thrown in here and there to pump up the [mostly white] crowd, now... half the songs sounded kind of metal-ish, and the other half sounded like a jam band-mess. they had the decency to utilize only the DJ for some of the best songs, but, overall, the finely produced and decidedly hip hop songs which i had grown to love from atmosphere had been given a weird, heavy metal-meets-phish-meets-dave matthews band makeover. yuck. so i left the show feeling slighty disoriented and a little betrayed. since it was my [repeat] FIFTH show, i was pretty confident and i had really hyped up the show for those who were accompanying me (including a guy i had just started dating that later turned out to have a girlfriend... good times! good memories!), and i lacked that when the show ended. "uhh... the shows aren't usually like that?" i was basically apologizing for my favorite rapper, something you should never really have to do (unless your favorite rapper is kanye west).
THE ROOTS:
the roots POSSIBLY have the most leeway in this category, because they are an actual band, and therefore have the freedom to do solos, interesting live covers of songs, and basically just keep jamming. when hip hop acts do this with their djs, it's forced and unnecessary ("yo, play the folks some of that led zepplin we were listening to the other day so i can rap over it, even though it has no connection to what i'm doing now").
so yeah, the roots get a free pass to SOME extend for their transgressions; namely, doing covers. this pass, however, does have a breaking point which they tend to reach all the damn time. when i saw them perform a few years ago at at my law school(a popular southern california private university that can afford to reimburse high-profile hip hop artists....), they did a medley of covers for about 15 minutes. that was their closer - 15 mins of other people's music. black thought occassionally rapping over it. mostly just the [incredibly talented] roots crew jamming to a wide variety of good songs. by other people.
i could go on.
MOS DEF:
anyhow, this phenomenon resurfaced when i saw mos def in a free show the following year at my law school and had told a gang of my friends about it. after having seen mos at the spitkicker tour back in '99 or so, and again at audiotistic (2001? 2002? who knows, it's all a blur), i was pretty excited to see this handsome devil perform again. uhhh... right. first of all, the previous times i had seen him he was really dapper and well-dressed, showing up like the mack that he is. here, he came in a hoodie and jeans, not quie what you hope for from mos, one of the more stylish artists in hip hop. and then came the music....
...lord, the music.
what followed was just a head-shaking mish-mash of half-performed songs; lazy rap-slash-singing, but mostly covers and a blend of scating and toasting or boasting or whatever it's called -- basically, mos turned into a 30's jazz singer all reefer-ed out mixed with wyclef 'i want to be jamaican' jean trying to sound like he's shabba ranks or something. por ejemplo - when he performed "ms. fat booty" (in my top 10 songs of all time), he went off on the "like gregory isaacs" part, singing the sampled song for a good minute or two before the beat came back in. now... that's fine and all, i mean - i get it - but when every song is interrupted/reinterpreted/bastardized, it gets really old really quickly. and he also did this thing where he just like started singing marvin gaye songs, stevie wonder songs, etc. uhhh... seriously? "black on both sides" is a CLASSIC album - why not do some of that? i mean, besides "ms. fat booty"?! i think that might have been the only song off that joint he performed in its entirety.
now, yeah - it was a free show and all, but still... have a little pride and integrity and respect for folks who come out to see your ass perform. for someone who hustled so hard so early, it's hard not to blame mos' current lack of effort on his various side projects - the "italian job" and it's spinoff; the tv movies; the broadway shows; the chappelle's show appearances. etc. further, perhaps mos and his partner in mos def effect-related crime, talib, should just perform together or not at all. because talib is equally lazy, unfocused, and cringe-worthy live.
the symptoms only got worse at rock the bells 2007. good.effing.grief. my brother and i were with one of my homeboys, and, from the beginning, i was really iffy about watching mos. i thought it might be time for a bathroom break, but i really didn't want to lose our coveted spot in the pit area. plus, my brother doesn't go to shows nearly as much as i do, and he didn't want to miss mos, who he quite likes. and, yeah... about five (5) minutes into the set, little bro goes "i'm done with mos def. OVER HIM. we should have gotten food."
the main problem with mos differs from that of atmosphere in a critical way; whereas atmosphere reimagines his popular hip hop songs with a really mediocre backing band, mos instead chooses to perform scattered snippets of past songs and possible future songs (i believe at one show he said something like "let me just fuck around with you for a minute... do some stuff i've been working on. is that cool wit y'all?" um, NO. do your ish and let's get to some booty-shaking and fist-pumping. none of your abstract neo-soul shenanigans.) also, he did the stupid covers again. look, mos. we all like marvin gaye, bob marley, etc. etc. etc. we GET that you are influenced by the past greats. don't pay us your record collection when we paid $90 bucks to get into some place - effing perform "mr. nigga" and "brooklyn" and even "rock and roll". the ONE song he consistently KILLS (in a good way) is "umi says", but that's because that song really encourages the kind of random, rambling singing he tries to inject into every song.
because mos is the most consistent and reckless offender, i had to name the phenomenon after him. someone with so much talent and so many weapons shouldn't perform like he's a drunk homeless dude let loose in a rare/vintage record shop. have some scruples.
***
anyhow. share the mos def effect theory with your friends and family the next time you go to see one of your favorite musicians/groups and they disappoint horribly. because it WILL happen, someday when you least expect it. either the fanbase will change drastically (or really young kids will begin to latch on to them) or the artist/s will choose to use a backing band when their songs NEED a DJ, or they will cover other artists for an extended period of time, or they will wax poetic about nothing interesting and just invite average-looking girls on the stage to dance. blah.
i have seen atmosphere, a minnesotan hip hop collective consisting of a rapper called slug and a producer called ant, a total of six times in various concert venues. i've seen the multi-talented mos def perform four times. i've seen mos' sometime-collaborator, talib kweli, a total of three times. the roots - the best hip hop band ever - i believe i've seen them two or three times. with the exception of talib, the aforementioned hip hop acts are among my all-time favorites, and i have listened to each artist/group obsessively at some point in my life.... however, all have succumbed to a plight i have tentatively named the mos def effect.
let me first briefly define the mos def effect, and then i'll elaborate on its background (according to me), its warning signs, and its proliferation.
the mos def effect occurs when an artist - presumably one of your favorites - begins to have less-than-stellar live performances. the live set is not lacking in energy or any technical/sound quality; rather, the substance of the set is borderline unbearable. put simply, the mos def effect occurs when a once-brilliant artist begins to have increasingly lazy, confusing, obnoxious, and/or annoying live performances, and one begins to question why they ever liked the artist in the first place.
- background and offenders -
ATMOSPHERE:
i began to detect the first traces of the mos def effect fairly recently, when i saw atmosphere perform at the wiltern in 2005. it was my fifth atmosphere show, and i was quite excited for it. atmosphere had become my favorite music group based largely on the fact their live shows were so incredible; slug is an engaging, dynamnic, and passionate rapper who really connects to the audience, and he generally enlisted some very skilled DJs to back up his vocals. however. for this particular performance, the DJ was resigned to being part of a larger backing band. whereas, in past shows, a heavy metal song snippet would be thrown in here and there to pump up the [mostly white] crowd, now... half the songs sounded kind of metal-ish, and the other half sounded like a jam band-mess. they had the decency to utilize only the DJ for some of the best songs, but, overall, the finely produced and decidedly hip hop songs which i had grown to love from atmosphere had been given a weird, heavy metal-meets-phish-meets-dave matthews band makeover. yuck. so i left the show feeling slighty disoriented and a little betrayed. since it was my [repeat] FIFTH show, i was pretty confident and i had really hyped up the show for those who were accompanying me (including a guy i had just started dating that later turned out to have a girlfriend... good times! good memories!), and i lacked that when the show ended. "uhh... the shows aren't usually like that?" i was basically apologizing for my favorite rapper, something you should never really have to do (unless your favorite rapper is kanye west).
THE ROOTS:
the roots POSSIBLY have the most leeway in this category, because they are an actual band, and therefore have the freedom to do solos, interesting live covers of songs, and basically just keep jamming. when hip hop acts do this with their djs, it's forced and unnecessary ("yo, play the folks some of that led zepplin we were listening to the other day so i can rap over it, even though it has no connection to what i'm doing now").
so yeah, the roots get a free pass to SOME extend for their transgressions; namely, doing covers. this pass, however, does have a breaking point which they tend to reach all the damn time. when i saw them perform a few years ago at at my law school(a popular southern california private university that can afford to reimburse high-profile hip hop artists....), they did a medley of covers for about 15 minutes. that was their closer - 15 mins of other people's music. black thought occassionally rapping over it. mostly just the [incredibly talented] roots crew jamming to a wide variety of good songs. by other people.
i could go on.
MOS DEF:
anyhow, this phenomenon resurfaced when i saw mos def in a free show the following year at my law school and had told a gang of my friends about it. after having seen mos at the spitkicker tour back in '99 or so, and again at audiotistic (2001? 2002? who knows, it's all a blur), i was pretty excited to see this handsome devil perform again. uhhh... right. first of all, the previous times i had seen him he was really dapper and well-dressed, showing up like the mack that he is. here, he came in a hoodie and jeans, not quie what you hope for from mos, one of the more stylish artists in hip hop. and then came the music....
...lord, the music.
what followed was just a head-shaking mish-mash of half-performed songs; lazy rap-slash-singing, but mostly covers and a blend of scating and toasting or boasting or whatever it's called -- basically, mos turned into a 30's jazz singer all reefer-ed out mixed with wyclef 'i want to be jamaican' jean trying to sound like he's shabba ranks or something. por ejemplo - when he performed "ms. fat booty" (in my top 10 songs of all time), he went off on the "like gregory isaacs" part, singing the sampled song for a good minute or two before the beat came back in. now... that's fine and all, i mean - i get it - but when every song is interrupted/reinterpreted/bastardized, it gets really old really quickly. and he also did this thing where he just like started singing marvin gaye songs, stevie wonder songs, etc. uhhh... seriously? "black on both sides" is a CLASSIC album - why not do some of that? i mean, besides "ms. fat booty"?! i think that might have been the only song off that joint he performed in its entirety.
now, yeah - it was a free show and all, but still... have a little pride and integrity and respect for folks who come out to see your ass perform. for someone who hustled so hard so early, it's hard not to blame mos' current lack of effort on his various side projects - the "italian job" and it's spinoff; the tv movies; the broadway shows; the chappelle's show appearances. etc. further, perhaps mos and his partner in mos def effect-related crime, talib, should just perform together or not at all. because talib is equally lazy, unfocused, and cringe-worthy live.
the symptoms only got worse at rock the bells 2007. good.effing.grief. my brother and i were with one of my homeboys, and, from the beginning, i was really iffy about watching mos. i thought it might be time for a bathroom break, but i really didn't want to lose our coveted spot in the pit area. plus, my brother doesn't go to shows nearly as much as i do, and he didn't want to miss mos, who he quite likes. and, yeah... about five (5) minutes into the set, little bro goes "i'm done with mos def. OVER HIM. we should have gotten food."
the main problem with mos differs from that of atmosphere in a critical way; whereas atmosphere reimagines his popular hip hop songs with a really mediocre backing band, mos instead chooses to perform scattered snippets of past songs and possible future songs (i believe at one show he said something like "let me just fuck around with you for a minute... do some stuff i've been working on. is that cool wit y'all?" um, NO. do your ish and let's get to some booty-shaking and fist-pumping. none of your abstract neo-soul shenanigans.) also, he did the stupid covers again. look, mos. we all like marvin gaye, bob marley, etc. etc. etc. we GET that you are influenced by the past greats. don't pay us your record collection when we paid $90 bucks to get into some place - effing perform "mr. nigga" and "brooklyn" and even "rock and roll". the ONE song he consistently KILLS (in a good way) is "umi says", but that's because that song really encourages the kind of random, rambling singing he tries to inject into every song.
because mos is the most consistent and reckless offender, i had to name the phenomenon after him. someone with so much talent and so many weapons shouldn't perform like he's a drunk homeless dude let loose in a rare/vintage record shop. have some scruples.
***
anyhow. share the mos def effect theory with your friends and family the next time you go to see one of your favorite musicians/groups and they disappoint horribly. because it WILL happen, someday when you least expect it. either the fanbase will change drastically (or really young kids will begin to latch on to them) or the artist/s will choose to use a backing band when their songs NEED a DJ, or they will cover other artists for an extended period of time, or they will wax poetic about nothing interesting and just invite average-looking girls on the stage to dance. blah.
16 August 2007
you don't know me.
have you ever regretted telling someone your nickname? i don't mean "my name's michael, but everyone calls me mike." i mean more like "my name is michael, but everyone calls me [insert random nickname resulting from some event, feature, or dirty deed here]."
i go by many nicknames, but i prefer that people i don't know not use my nicknames. i think it's presumptive and a little arrogant to call someone you don't know by their nickname. if i ever came across michael jordan in person, i wouldn't be like "yo MJ! what up?!" i'd be like "hi mr. jordan!" world-class athletes aside, i think it's weird when someone who doesn't know the story or circumstance behind a nickname insists on calling you that. or worse yet, when someone hears your nickname and takes it upon themselves to start using it - without your blessing. that ish irks me.
case in point - during my first week at work, i made the mistake of responding to the "do you have any nicknames?" question asked by my coworkers. i chose to respond with the most universally-known and used one, "j9". little did i know this would basically become my name around the office, so that when those previously unfamiliar coworkers quickly became the thorns in my side, hearing my nickname turned into a form of pavlovian torture. i now cringe whenever i hear 'j9' during the day, because it's basically been bastardized at this point. for the older crowd, it makes them feel cool to say it and like they're down w/me. for the younger set, it makes them feel like we're much better friends than we actually are (except for one coworker, who really is my friend). but it also leads to annoying comments, such as an email today from one of my bosses that read "what does J9 stand for?" um... really? it's a letter and a number, not a complicated acronym with puncutation and such. another brilliant move is when someone has some crap assignment to pass along to me or tries to get out of doing something and they're like "J9 will do it!"
j9 will throw 'bows at you, mofo.
maybe it's just work-related? i'm not really sure. perhaps i consider nicknames best shared and used amongst family and friends, due to their familiar quality and personal nature.
i go by many nicknames, but i prefer that people i don't know not use my nicknames. i think it's presumptive and a little arrogant to call someone you don't know by their nickname. if i ever came across michael jordan in person, i wouldn't be like "yo MJ! what up?!" i'd be like "hi mr. jordan!" world-class athletes aside, i think it's weird when someone who doesn't know the story or circumstance behind a nickname insists on calling you that. or worse yet, when someone hears your nickname and takes it upon themselves to start using it - without your blessing. that ish irks me.
case in point - during my first week at work, i made the mistake of responding to the "do you have any nicknames?" question asked by my coworkers. i chose to respond with the most universally-known and used one, "j9". little did i know this would basically become my name around the office, so that when those previously unfamiliar coworkers quickly became the thorns in my side, hearing my nickname turned into a form of pavlovian torture. i now cringe whenever i hear 'j9' during the day, because it's basically been bastardized at this point. for the older crowd, it makes them feel cool to say it and like they're down w/me. for the younger set, it makes them feel like we're much better friends than we actually are (except for one coworker, who really is my friend). but it also leads to annoying comments, such as an email today from one of my bosses that read "what does J9 stand for?" um... really? it's a letter and a number, not a complicated acronym with puncutation and such. another brilliant move is when someone has some crap assignment to pass along to me or tries to get out of doing something and they're like "J9 will do it!"
j9 will throw 'bows at you, mofo.
maybe it's just work-related? i'm not really sure. perhaps i consider nicknames best shared and used amongst family and friends, due to their familiar quality and personal nature.
12 August 2007
malcontent.
so i just finished reading a few articles in the latest vogue and have come to the conclusion that i am a better writer than the broads they solicit to contribute soulless editorials and almost-funny features. the cover stories are generally pretty bland; usually little more than people magazine-type gushing laced w/detailed accounts of wardrobe, menu, and makeup choices. i feel like matt damon's character in good will hunting, when he goes off on the supposed brilliant minds in the field of physics - "do you know how easy this is?I this is a fucking joke." (slightly paraphrased, i'm sure.) but seriously... i mean, i know i don't know enough about fashion or society to write for a magazine like vogue, and i know it's not like i'm a published writer or anything... but there is very little writing out there that blows my mind - and we won't even get into female writers, who have gone past good and back to bad again (excepting joan didion).
anyway, i was so bored by vogue that i actually took to creating this little blog just to gripe about it. perhaps it is too much to ask that my fashion magazine of choice actually feature intriguing, sharp writing that doesn't sacrifice wit for readability. perhaps i am too much a cynic/skeptic and demand too much sarcasm and snideness in what i read before bed (might be time to get some more bukowski...) or perhaps it's time for me to just do something about it and write something that i actually would want to read. i think all scenarios are true, and in the spirit of practicing what i preach, i am going to start writing.
(btw, as i type, i am lounging in my p.e. shorts from junior high, designer unknown, and two plain white wifebeaters (hanes). a tattered, hideously printed sateen scarf is wrapped around my head, and my skin is almost greasy from a liberal application of cetaphil moisterizer.)
anyway, i was so bored by vogue that i actually took to creating this little blog just to gripe about it. perhaps it is too much to ask that my fashion magazine of choice actually feature intriguing, sharp writing that doesn't sacrifice wit for readability. perhaps i am too much a cynic/skeptic and demand too much sarcasm and snideness in what i read before bed (might be time to get some more bukowski...) or perhaps it's time for me to just do something about it and write something that i actually would want to read. i think all scenarios are true, and in the spirit of practicing what i preach, i am going to start writing.
(btw, as i type, i am lounging in my p.e. shorts from junior high, designer unknown, and two plain white wifebeaters (hanes). a tattered, hideously printed sateen scarf is wrapped around my head, and my skin is almost greasy from a liberal application of cetaphil moisterizer.)
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